compyuutah

Entry tags:

gay

[from here]

I'm not going to leave you behind.

[It's a firm response almost immediately as Armin shifts in Jean's grip. It's likely painful for the both of them in this close space, skin rubbing against skin as he slips down. His hands move to Jean's wrists to guide them away so he can properly slip down into the space in front of him.

It's not nearly as cramped for him as it is for Jean, but they're still pressed uncomfortably close, with his face right to the damage Jean has sustained.]

Can you reach behind me to my pack? There are some bandages in there.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[The motions catch him off guard, somehow, and his chest tightens as he feels Jean's fingers through his hair. The hand around his waist does help him feel more stable, but suddenly he's positioned so directly over Jean's legs it's awkward.

No one's ever given him this sort of attention before, and he's uncertain of how to handle it. On top of that, it's startling enough to be intimidating and worrying, but it's not bad either. He freezes in place with his eyes locked on his friend before they slide over to the bucket.]

Ah-- [Right. Water. Maybe he should just focus on that? Whatever was going on with Jean, he did need water. He slides the bucket closer before dipping his hands in for another handful, awkwardly attempting to hold up his hands for Jean to drink from at this new angle.]

[Greedily, he drinks again, lifting Armin's hand to his mouth and drinking them dry, not registering when the water's gone. His lips press down into the palms of his hands before he looks up, smiling. But Armin is so far up it's hard to tell if he can see his smile. Jean drags him down, gently and by the back of the head. And then the distance between their faces is so close that he can feel Armin's breath and he wonders idly, what happens when two people breathe into each other and decides to test that out too. The gap between their mouths close–Jean presses his lips against Armin's.]

[It's strange enough trying to give Jean enough water from his hands. The bucket is too large for him to lift properly and there aren't any canteens or bowls around to use to hold it in place. So he'd done his best to work with what he had, ignoring the awkwardness of it all. But gradually, instead of growing less awkward, it was becoming moreso, and Armin couldn't quite pinpoint why.

This time in particular has Jean's lips at his hands for a few seconds too long, and he's just about processing it with an embarrassed twinge of realization. But then that hand at the back of his head is bringing him down more, and he's dropping his hands to either side of Jean to keep himself propped up. Blinking at Jean's eyes, confusion heavier than before washes over him, and he quietly starts to speak up.]

Jean? [But that seems to go unheard. Soon enough, their lips are meeting and an unusual hot feeling spreads from his face down the rest of his body. He's frozen at first, mind racing so fast he can't make sense of his thoughts at all, and before he even realizes it, he's hesitantly leaning into it with a sort of shy kiss back.]

[The reciprocation earns a pleased noise from Jean, the sound muffled by the kiss deepening. The arm around his waist pulls him closer while the other tangles itself in Armin's hair, combing through it as he presses further into the kiss, seeking out small noises of confirmation. Ones that can forgive the way their teeth occasionally meet and how their noses bump.

He's new at this but he doesn't care. For once, the blush on his cheeks is light and–at this point–probably just a sunburn. Delirium boosts confidence and now Jean is brimming with it.

When he finally pulls away, Armin is perched neatly in his lap with one of his hands pressing into the small of his back. The doofy smile hasn't faded.]

Thanks.

I--

[He stammers once the thank you comes and he's met with the realization that he's sitting without pants in Jean's (who is without pants AND a shirt) lap. That they'd just kissed. For a considerable amount of time, actually, and he'd been so tempted to just stop thinking and go with it. It was kind of terrifying but also terribly exciting...

And now he wasn't sure how to handle it. What to think of it. His face was pinker than he was ever used to having to deal with (terror was one thing, anger was another, but this--), and Jean was still just smiling at him like that.]

I didn't-- [Mean for that to happen at all. That's true enough, but he stops himself in the realization that that's not quite right to say, and it may cause more issues.

He tries to take a calmer breath in and out, eyes resting hesitantly just below Jean's chin and keeping them firmly there to avoid any eye contact.]

I'm sorry. [He finally says that in a breathy sort of exhale, one of his hands raising to press the back to Jean's forehead and test his temperature.] You must have a fever. Or...

[...]

We should get out of this place.

[That seems to jerk Jean back. The smile evaporates within an instant and his hand moves from Armin's back to his wrist, seizing it tightly.]

Not before you clean your injuries.

[Look, he'll even try and get the water, fingers reaching for the bucket without moving Armin out of his lap. It doesn't really work; Jean loses balance and tips onto his side, the bucket splashing onto him and soaking his hair. He sighs, relieved.]

We should go where there's more water.

[It feels so nice.]

Jean!

[Shoving the bucket out of the way, Armin moves himself so he can grab Jean and pull him closer, lifting him up off of the ground. This isn't good. And he was just sitting here messing around like that...]

Hang in there, Jean. [It's a voice that's both quiet and determined as he sets out on working on solving this. His wounds were fine.]

[It takes a long while for someone of Armin's strength to drag Jean all the way out, but he manages. Not without some help at the entrance, of course. Now here they were some time later (hours? days?) and Jean still hasn't woken up. The nurse/healer he'd asked for help seemed to say he was healthy, which was good news, but it wasn't enough to rid Armin of the guilt from all of this.

He's struggling with himself over all of this, honestly, and there's so many complicated thoughts going through his mind. Armin had stayed here waiting for him to recover completely so he'd be able to speak to him, but no such luck yet. At least he'd found some temporary clothes to work with-- a simple dress shirt that was a little too big and some slacks.

He'd spent a lot of time sitting in a chair he'd pulled up next to the bed Jean was resting in. Looking down at his own hands, thinking, remembering, looking back to Jean... People would visit now and again but right now it was a quiet time.

Crossing his arms over a small bit of sheets on the bed, he leaned forward in his chair and let his head lay down on top of them so he could watch Jean. ...At least, he did for a few minutes, before his eyelids got heavy as well and he drifted off to sleep waiting.]

[It's a day later that Jean wakes up. Eyelids heavier than he remembers take a long while to open and for a moment, he thinks that someone is holding him there–clamping his eyes shut. He panics, bolts upright and bursting his eyes open in retaliation only to find that everything's fine. Mid-afternoon sunlight sends dust motes through the window, curtains ruffle quietly in a soft breeze, and Armin sits nearby, attentive.

Jean doesn't expect the latter. The surprise makes him stare, throat caught for a quick moment before he swallows it hesitantly and...

Tries to speak but nothing comes out. There's a brief pause where he reteaches himself words, pronunciation, and then:]

Where am I?

[Voice is soft–concerned yet curious. The thing that confuses him most is why Armin is still at his side.] What are you doing here?

[The feeling of Jean jolting up brings Armin to sit upright from his position as well. Immediately he's watching Jean for reactions, shoulders relaxing when the questions come out normal and there's no goofy smile to accompany it.

Thank god.]

We're in one of the empty rooms in the dormitories. [One of his hands instinctively moves forward to rest on the sheets over Jean's lower leg to comfort him.] I brought you as far as I could, and there were some others at the entrance to the cavern that were able to help. ...You've been resting here for a while-- about a day-- so when you didn't wake up...

[How was he supposed to leave?]

Wait, you–[Holds up a hand leaning closer towards Armin.] You carried me all the way back?

[He pulls back slightly, regarding him with both disbelief and respect.] You're such a shrimp, I'd never figure you'd be able to handle something like that.

[A short grin. He's definitely impressed. Maybe a touch flattered that someone would do that for him, nevermind wait until he wakes up. Still smiling, he flops back onto the pillow–winces slightly–and watches the blonde.] So you thought I was gonna die, huh? Must have been bad.

I don't really think it's something to joke off like that...

[With a smile, like it was amusing or anything of the sort. It was serious. Armin was worried. Sometimes he doesn't get Jean... but--

He pulls his hand back after an awkward moment, eyes shifting from his lap to Jean again.]

Do you remember anything at all?

[His smile fades at the scolding. He shifts in his seat before glancing down at his hands.]

Not after a point. Maybe when we left the tunnel?

[He presses a hand into his hair, trying to clear his head. Remember the exact point.]

[Armin grows quiet at that, head turning down a bit as he thinks. Maybe it's for the best? He was clearly out of it. He didn't want to share unnecessary things that would only cause problems. And he's not quite sure he understands it himself.

Staying silent wouldn't help either, though. He knows that.]

You were really out of it. [That's enough of a summary, he thinks, looking back up to him.] How are you feeling now?

About as good as I should. [His body aches, but he's not sure if that's because of being stationary too long or a lingering result of the injuries.] Kind of thirsty. Not bad considering the circumstances.

[Timid attempt at a reassuring grin, maybe? Armin seems pretty worried.]

Oh... I'll get you some water. Give me just a moment.

[Worried, yes, and his mind is wandering on top of that. But action would help with that, he thought. Debating on what he should or shouldn't reveal to people was always a frustrating task. Even so, the answers came to mind pretty firmly. If Jean didn't remember, then...

He pushes up from his chair and moves to fetch him a quick glass, returning after a few minutes to offer it forward once he'd found it.]

Thanks.

[When he takes it, his fingers brush against Armin's. If he notices, he doesn't show it, sipping the water pensively. Trying to remember what Armin could be referring to and coming up blank. It's frustrating, but after a couple sips he gives up, leaning to deposit the glass on the bedside table.]

Has anyone else come around?

[It's strange-- Armin doesn't normally pay attention to things like this, but the weight of what's on his mind right now has him all too aware of the way their fingers brush. He plays it off without even a blink in reaction, but he's feeling awkward by the time he sits back down. The small tells are in the way he holds himself. His overly straight posture.]

Eren visited briefly, and Mikasa followed him. I think everyone else thought it better to leave you to rest.

Ah. [He breathes out a forced laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.] Should have figured it'd be something like that.

[Can you blame him for hoping more people would care? It's shameful, really. But what more could you expect from a selfish guy?

He sighs quietly, looking back at Armin as if just noticing the stiff posture.] You're pretty on-edge, huh?

You shouldn't worry about it. [He has a feeling he knows what Jean's thinking on the matter, and he's quick to shut it down.] Everyone was worried. Most people just checked in over the pocket watch.

['Everyone' may be a little too kind, but plenty of people were worried. He wanted to stress that. But then Jean's shooting him a question, and he has to react pretty immediately to that as well, hands folding into his lap a little tightly.]

I'm fine. [But the way it comes out so quickly seems defensive, he realizes, and he's quick to add on more to soften it.] I'm just thinking that it's been a long past couple of days.

[...]

I'm sorry. I knew it was risky to go further, but I couldn't pass up the possibility of finding out something more...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

gay

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

1/2

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject